"It ain't all good, but it's all good enough. So, I know I'm alright." Eyedea
When things are good they could always be better. No matter what we do we have reasons to complain. We search for something to be "wrong." We have an insatiable desire for bigger better things.
I'm in a good spot. The best place I've been in quite a while. I'm happy, in a new relationship, live in a nice house, have a job, and am getting closer to family on a daily basis. While I really like where I'm at, and I shouldn't complain. I know I could be doing certain things differently. We all could. This is just part of our need for more.
It is human nature to be greedy. Like it or not! Argue if you will, but we all know it's true. Proof: we go to buffets. Do we stop eating when we are satisfied or full? No, we keep going back for plate after plate. Just because it's there, and just because we can. That's greed. Taking more when we need none. It's evident in everyday life, and everyday activities.
"But time taught me how to see every second as heaven even though they're perfectly disguised as hell." Eyedea
One thing it seems none of us are capable of, is acknowledging that it could always be worse. No matter how down we are, there is always further to fall. We all handle things like they are some sort of tragedy. The irony in it is when we look back after we've made it through, it seems almost comical.
We all need to learn to live in the now. To be content with where we are at in life. Smile when we should, and even we don't believe we can. Excuse me for being cliche, but we must roll with the punches. When we accept the beauty that is our everyday life, we will then be able to move on to bigger and better things.
The two quotes I've used are from Eydea & Abilities "Smile." Eyedea was by far one of the most prolific and profound artist that has ever lived. The song has the best message I've ever heard conveyed through music. Definitely worth a listen, but only if you analyze the lyrics. Eyedeas lyrics have the capability to change you outlook on everything. Life, love, music, and faith. R.I.P. Mr. Larsen aka Eyedea.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
My Obsession
So, I have this fascination with Superman. Okay, it's more of an obsession. I own far too many like themed clothing articles, and have even gotten his shield tattooed on my back. Most of my friends even refer to me as Superman. You may ask yourself, "why is a 25 year old man into Superman?" I ask you, "why not?"
"Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men." John Emerich Edward Dalberg Acton. We are all born with absolute power and control over our lives. Ultimately we decide how we live, and what we want to do with our "talents." For the most part, we do enough to get by. Enough to not stand out. Many that do choose to stand out, often stand out for the wrong reasons.
Yes, he is a fictional character, but take Clark Kent. Just an average down home boy who is not so average. He bears a great moral obligation to do the best he can for this world. He doesn't choose to because he is practically invincible. He does so because it's the right thing to do. He takes it upon himself to use his unique abilities for the good of mankind.
Many will find that hard to grasp, because he is super powered. But think of how easy it would be for anyone in his shoes to take advantage, and ultimately do bad. Maybe even do nothing at all. He sticks to his moral beliefs, and never falters. If we could all do the same...
We are living in a world, where morality means almost nothing. Everyone just waiting for the next person's back to turn, so they can put a blade in it. With the offer of money we will do almost anything we would normally oppose. Loyalty is almost non existent, and there are few that understand the concept.
So like I said..."why not?" Who better to have as a moral compass? The morals, convictions, and beliefs that have been instilled in me and developed as I have grown. I stick to. The honor of being a genuine person is worth more to me than all the money in the world. The respect you gain from never wavering from your stand is amazing.
Superman and my father are my role models. I have tattoos for both, to remind me everyday of how I should live my life. I like to think of myself as the guardian of my friends and family. Sounds lame, I know. But I would do anything on any day to make sure they are safe. I also like to believe that this is why the nickname has stuck with me. Along with me efforts to always be the best I can.
Fictional character, yes. Who are your role models? People you've heard or read about in books? Think about who writes these "historical events." While these events and people did/do exist. Much of their stories are also fictionalized. We read, hear, and see what the authors want us to believe as true. So how is Superman any different?
"Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men." John Emerich Edward Dalberg Acton. We are all born with absolute power and control over our lives. Ultimately we decide how we live, and what we want to do with our "talents." For the most part, we do enough to get by. Enough to not stand out. Many that do choose to stand out, often stand out for the wrong reasons.
Yes, he is a fictional character, but take Clark Kent. Just an average down home boy who is not so average. He bears a great moral obligation to do the best he can for this world. He doesn't choose to because he is practically invincible. He does so because it's the right thing to do. He takes it upon himself to use his unique abilities for the good of mankind.
Many will find that hard to grasp, because he is super powered. But think of how easy it would be for anyone in his shoes to take advantage, and ultimately do bad. Maybe even do nothing at all. He sticks to his moral beliefs, and never falters. If we could all do the same...
We are living in a world, where morality means almost nothing. Everyone just waiting for the next person's back to turn, so they can put a blade in it. With the offer of money we will do almost anything we would normally oppose. Loyalty is almost non existent, and there are few that understand the concept.
So like I said..."why not?" Who better to have as a moral compass? The morals, convictions, and beliefs that have been instilled in me and developed as I have grown. I stick to. The honor of being a genuine person is worth more to me than all the money in the world. The respect you gain from never wavering from your stand is amazing.
Superman and my father are my role models. I have tattoos for both, to remind me everyday of how I should live my life. I like to think of myself as the guardian of my friends and family. Sounds lame, I know. But I would do anything on any day to make sure they are safe. I also like to believe that this is why the nickname has stuck with me. Along with me efforts to always be the best I can.
Fictional character, yes. Who are your role models? People you've heard or read about in books? Think about who writes these "historical events." While these events and people did/do exist. Much of their stories are also fictionalized. We read, hear, and see what the authors want us to believe as true. So how is Superman any different?
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Legacy
"You will be different, sometimes you'll feel like an outcast, but you'll never be alone. You will make my strength your own. You will see my life through your eyes, as your life will be seen through mine. The son becomes the father and the father becomes the son." Superman to Jason.
Today is the 10 year anniversary of my father's death. Every year around this time it is inevitable that I become slightly depressed. Who wouldn't? It is a day that changed my life. It's the day I lost my father. A day that will forever affect me, whether I realize it or not.
This year is different. I have grown so much, and experienced so many things. It has been a year of enlightenment. I have grown to know who I really am, and that it is because of my father I am this way. He was a good man. The best I've ever known. If I could grow to be half as wise, smart, caring, and good as him. I will have achieved everything I've ever hoped for.
He was everything to me. Of course, like all fathers and sons we had our differences. It wouldn't be natural to not. He always pushed me to do better. He taught me to play basketball, and he taught me well. He kept me active in boy scouts, sat in on wrestling practice, encouraged me when I couldn't get a song on the sax just right, practiced football with me, came to every sporting event, every scout meeting, and above all else was always a good role model.
I've always felt like I would never live up to the expectations he had for me. Or even mine for that matter. I know he watches me, and sees the man I've become. Just as when I was a kid, I watched and learned from the man he was. I am growing into the man he was. In essence, his strength has become mine.
Since he's been gone I've come to realize that it is my responsibility to carry on his legacy. It is my honor, as his son, to do so. If I can influence people around the way he did, and teach them to be good. I could actually succeed in making a difference. Carrying on his lessons is my way to pay it forward.
Many people have said similar things, but Eminem strikes me most. "instead of mourning your death, I'd rather celebrate your life. Elevate to new heights.." From now on, this day will be the celebration of a good man. It will be a reason for me to be happy. Happy that I was blessed with such an amazing role model, a day to remember my father, to remember the things he taught me, to remind myself to stay on track, to honor my father's name the only way I know how, and that is to try each and every day to be like him.
Today is the 10 year anniversary of my father's death. Every year around this time it is inevitable that I become slightly depressed. Who wouldn't? It is a day that changed my life. It's the day I lost my father. A day that will forever affect me, whether I realize it or not.
This year is different. I have grown so much, and experienced so many things. It has been a year of enlightenment. I have grown to know who I really am, and that it is because of my father I am this way. He was a good man. The best I've ever known. If I could grow to be half as wise, smart, caring, and good as him. I will have achieved everything I've ever hoped for.
He was everything to me. Of course, like all fathers and sons we had our differences. It wouldn't be natural to not. He always pushed me to do better. He taught me to play basketball, and he taught me well. He kept me active in boy scouts, sat in on wrestling practice, encouraged me when I couldn't get a song on the sax just right, practiced football with me, came to every sporting event, every scout meeting, and above all else was always a good role model.
I've always felt like I would never live up to the expectations he had for me. Or even mine for that matter. I know he watches me, and sees the man I've become. Just as when I was a kid, I watched and learned from the man he was. I am growing into the man he was. In essence, his strength has become mine.
Since he's been gone I've come to realize that it is my responsibility to carry on his legacy. It is my honor, as his son, to do so. If I can influence people around the way he did, and teach them to be good. I could actually succeed in making a difference. Carrying on his lessons is my way to pay it forward.
Many people have said similar things, but Eminem strikes me most. "instead of mourning your death, I'd rather celebrate your life. Elevate to new heights.." From now on, this day will be the celebration of a good man. It will be a reason for me to be happy. Happy that I was blessed with such an amazing role model, a day to remember my father, to remember the things he taught me, to remind myself to stay on track, to honor my father's name the only way I know how, and that is to try each and every day to be like him.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Complications of A Big Heart/Shadows of The Past
As I've stated before, I'm adopted. I came to live with this family in 1995. For the most part it has been great! Just like any normal family we have our issues. I wouldn't trade my family for the world.
Here's my story...
I was born into drugs, alcohol, prostitution, and various other things. My earliest memory is from when I was a year and a half. We were bringing my newborn little sister home. Needless to say I've got a lot of memories. For the most part they're all bad.
We moved around a lot. Never really staying anywhere for long. We lived anywhere from motels, trailers, apartments, town homes, to cars. And for the majority of the time, we were without things like heat and electricity. To take baths we had to heat water up on the stove, and dump it in the tub. Once there was enough water all five of us would take turns bathing in the same water.
The food stamps we received weren't enough. Many times for dinner we'd get a slice of fried bologna. One pack of it would feed all of us for a week. There was no such thing as pop or candy for us. If we were lucky enough to have milk, it was powdered. When we didn't we'd eat the cereal that we stole from school with water. Even the water was bad, coming straight from a well or a neighbors water hose most of the time.
We lived in freezing temperatures during winter. Everyone wearing everything they can, and all huddled under the same blanket to keep warm. Seeing our breath in doors was a common occurrence. Staying up all night in front of the oven with the door open trying to get some kind of heat was as well.
My father was a violent, abusive alcoholic. Many times I witnessed him beating my mother, and constantly being arrested for guns, drugs, domestic violence, and assault. He would chase us around the house throwing knives at our feet. We would constantly lock ourselves in the bathroom to get away from him. There was no escaping, he would always eventually kick in the door.
My mother was also an alcoholic with a drug problem. She wasn't violent towards us, and she did her best. She would frequently bring strange men home, and you could imagine the things we'd see. After our father was finally gone, she would sometimes leave for days on end. All 5 of us kids just left alone.
One day she left, said she was going to get money from someone who owes her. She never came back. My youngest sister was just over a year old, my oldest brother was 9. We'd been here before, so we knew exactly what to do. My brother would stay home with my little sister, and my other two sisters and I would walk to school like we did every other day. We knew what to do to not get caught, but I guess we didn't do well enough.
A week of this goes by, and they finally caught on. My brother hadn't been to school in a week, and we hadn't bathed, combed our hair, or changed clothes in the same. On that last day, instead of walking home at the end of the day we were called into the office. The waiting for the three of us was; my brother, sister, DHS, and the police. Wed been caught onto.
They immediately take us to the youth shelter. Which is just a nicer way of saying orphanage. We were there for over a month before our mom came. How long would we have been left alone? Why didn't she come sooner? We spent a few more weeks there, before we were all split up.
After the shelter we bounced around, from foster home to foster home and back to the shelter. Until our grandma, grandpa, aunts, and uncles won custody of us. We stayed with them until our grandma was stricken with cancer, and they just couldn't take care of us anymore. Back to the shelter we went.
This was only for a short time. We were then sent to the family that eventually adopted us. Our family. We've had our ups and downs with them. Six years after being adopted, we lost our adoptive father. The man we all consider our real father. Since being adopted we hadn't looked in the direction of our biological family.
But what happens when over 15 years later, they try to come roaring back into your life? My birth mother has recently attempted to contact my siblings and I through Facebook. Why?! After all these years? I have no interest in asking questions, and I have no answers for her questions. I know the events of our past, and I stand to gain nothing from contact with her. Is this for her own peace of mind? Is this how she plans to make herself feel better about everything? Do I talk to her and give her that, when she's given me nothing but heartache and bad memories? Am I bitter for not wanting to talk to her? What would other people do? Am I wrong for just wanting her to be gone, and not come back? I wish her no ill will, and only the best. But it is in mine and my family's best interest to not be involved with her.
I was raised by two amazing people, and given a great life. I've been afforded many opportunities because of them. I'm thankful everyday for the family I've gained through this adoption, and for the people that are a part of my life because of it.
Here's my story...
I was born into drugs, alcohol, prostitution, and various other things. My earliest memory is from when I was a year and a half. We were bringing my newborn little sister home. Needless to say I've got a lot of memories. For the most part they're all bad.
We moved around a lot. Never really staying anywhere for long. We lived anywhere from motels, trailers, apartments, town homes, to cars. And for the majority of the time, we were without things like heat and electricity. To take baths we had to heat water up on the stove, and dump it in the tub. Once there was enough water all five of us would take turns bathing in the same water.
The food stamps we received weren't enough. Many times for dinner we'd get a slice of fried bologna. One pack of it would feed all of us for a week. There was no such thing as pop or candy for us. If we were lucky enough to have milk, it was powdered. When we didn't we'd eat the cereal that we stole from school with water. Even the water was bad, coming straight from a well or a neighbors water hose most of the time.
We lived in freezing temperatures during winter. Everyone wearing everything they can, and all huddled under the same blanket to keep warm. Seeing our breath in doors was a common occurrence. Staying up all night in front of the oven with the door open trying to get some kind of heat was as well.
My father was a violent, abusive alcoholic. Many times I witnessed him beating my mother, and constantly being arrested for guns, drugs, domestic violence, and assault. He would chase us around the house throwing knives at our feet. We would constantly lock ourselves in the bathroom to get away from him. There was no escaping, he would always eventually kick in the door.
My mother was also an alcoholic with a drug problem. She wasn't violent towards us, and she did her best. She would frequently bring strange men home, and you could imagine the things we'd see. After our father was finally gone, she would sometimes leave for days on end. All 5 of us kids just left alone.
One day she left, said she was going to get money from someone who owes her. She never came back. My youngest sister was just over a year old, my oldest brother was 9. We'd been here before, so we knew exactly what to do. My brother would stay home with my little sister, and my other two sisters and I would walk to school like we did every other day. We knew what to do to not get caught, but I guess we didn't do well enough.
A week of this goes by, and they finally caught on. My brother hadn't been to school in a week, and we hadn't bathed, combed our hair, or changed clothes in the same. On that last day, instead of walking home at the end of the day we were called into the office. The waiting for the three of us was; my brother, sister, DHS, and the police. Wed been caught onto.
They immediately take us to the youth shelter. Which is just a nicer way of saying orphanage. We were there for over a month before our mom came. How long would we have been left alone? Why didn't she come sooner? We spent a few more weeks there, before we were all split up.
After the shelter we bounced around, from foster home to foster home and back to the shelter. Until our grandma, grandpa, aunts, and uncles won custody of us. We stayed with them until our grandma was stricken with cancer, and they just couldn't take care of us anymore. Back to the shelter we went.
This was only for a short time. We were then sent to the family that eventually adopted us. Our family. We've had our ups and downs with them. Six years after being adopted, we lost our adoptive father. The man we all consider our real father. Since being adopted we hadn't looked in the direction of our biological family.
But what happens when over 15 years later, they try to come roaring back into your life? My birth mother has recently attempted to contact my siblings and I through Facebook. Why?! After all these years? I have no interest in asking questions, and I have no answers for her questions. I know the events of our past, and I stand to gain nothing from contact with her. Is this for her own peace of mind? Is this how she plans to make herself feel better about everything? Do I talk to her and give her that, when she's given me nothing but heartache and bad memories? Am I bitter for not wanting to talk to her? What would other people do? Am I wrong for just wanting her to be gone, and not come back? I wish her no ill will, and only the best. But it is in mine and my family's best interest to not be involved with her.
I was raised by two amazing people, and given a great life. I've been afforded many opportunities because of them. I'm thankful everyday for the family I've gained through this adoption, and for the people that are a part of my life because of it.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Good Parents
For many moral reasons, we do not accept food stamps/EBT at the store. I don't agree with the system, or most of the people using them.
Here's an everyday scenario. A mom or dad come in, usually with two to three kids. "Give me a pack of your cheapest smokes, and what cheap vodkas do you have?" At this time the kids are picking out a candy bar or bag of chips. Both $.99. I ring up their $3.75 cigarettes, and the $3.80 bottle of Potter's Vodka. The kids come up, "mommy, daddy can I get this?!" "No! We don't have money for that!" they shun their children. "How much is it?" they ask. "7.55" I tell them. "you accept EBT right?" they pose. "I'm sorry, no we don't" I respond. They proceed to get mad, and tell me how absurd it is that we don't. When absurd is probably just a cool word they heard on a show, and they don't know what it means. They pull out a crisp $100 bill, and pay.
I thought they said they didn't have enough to buy the bag of chips that cost $.99? Strange. Isn't EBT/food stamps given to you to help with the care and well being of your children? Apparently, it's given to quench the alcoholism of the parents. I don't have kids, but I do know that a parent should go without before their child ever does! I would not ever bring my children with me to go spend food stamps on alcohol. There are people like this all over the country, milking the system. When, there are also people who would use it for the right reason, and they can't even qualify! It is my belief that the system needs a serious overhaul, and parents like these should lose their children until they can prove they deserve them. Until they realize the error of their ways.
I grew up on food stamps, and still we didn't have much. Practically nothing, but our parents did without too! While nowadays there are kids who have never had a Snickers bar, because their "parents" need there alcohol, cigarettes, weed, and miscellaneous other substances. It sickens me to witness, and pisses me off the Child Protective Services exist for no reason. They must spend all day facebooking and playing farmville, because they're not doing their jobs. This is just another example of our country's mixed up priorities.
Here's an everyday scenario. A mom or dad come in, usually with two to three kids. "Give me a pack of your cheapest smokes, and what cheap vodkas do you have?" At this time the kids are picking out a candy bar or bag of chips. Both $.99. I ring up their $3.75 cigarettes, and the $3.80 bottle of Potter's Vodka. The kids come up, "mommy, daddy can I get this?!" "No! We don't have money for that!" they shun their children. "How much is it?" they ask. "7.55" I tell them. "you accept EBT right?" they pose. "I'm sorry, no we don't" I respond. They proceed to get mad, and tell me how absurd it is that we don't. When absurd is probably just a cool word they heard on a show, and they don't know what it means. They pull out a crisp $100 bill, and pay.
I thought they said they didn't have enough to buy the bag of chips that cost $.99? Strange. Isn't EBT/food stamps given to you to help with the care and well being of your children? Apparently, it's given to quench the alcoholism of the parents. I don't have kids, but I do know that a parent should go without before their child ever does! I would not ever bring my children with me to go spend food stamps on alcohol. There are people like this all over the country, milking the system. When, there are also people who would use it for the right reason, and they can't even qualify! It is my belief that the system needs a serious overhaul, and parents like these should lose their children until they can prove they deserve them. Until they realize the error of their ways.
I grew up on food stamps, and still we didn't have much. Practically nothing, but our parents did without too! While nowadays there are kids who have never had a Snickers bar, because their "parents" need there alcohol, cigarettes, weed, and miscellaneous other substances. It sickens me to witness, and pisses me off the Child Protective Services exist for no reason. They must spend all day facebooking and playing farmville, because they're not doing their jobs. This is just another example of our country's mixed up priorities.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Family
They say friends are the family you choose. Friends are the people we hand pick to be a part of our lives. We usually find something in them, that is the exact opposite of what we can't stand about our families. Personally, I'm not very close to family. Part by choice, and part by things I can't control.
My best friend happens to be my sister. Someone with whom I never got along with growing up. We've shared apartments, friends, money, and hardships. Mostly because of the fact that we are siblings. In recent years I haven't felt obligated, but have chosen to be involved. Sure, she may not like it sometimes. Like when I scare other guys away, or try to beat up her boyfriends. However, I know that in the end she is thankful for it. Her best interest is my best interest.
I was engaged early this past year. When it all ended, and I was lost. She was standing there with my compass. She was the "spinning arrow" in Pocahontas' dream. We hadn't been getting along too well, due to reasons I will not disclose. What matters is she was there when I needed someone most. Through her I realized that things would work out, and some things are destined for failure(i.e. the engagement)
My point being. We spend a lot of our time, complaining and not liking family. We go out of our ways to distance ourselves from them, and pretending they don't mean much to you. When things with friends change in a heartbeat. Friendships between men ruined because of a girl. Relationships between women ended over a man. He says she says can form sides, and create a war between friends. So many petty things can expose true colors, and we put so much time and effort into our friends. When no matter the differences, our families are always there. No matter what has gone on between us, we'll always be there. So why don't we make family the friends we choose, for once. Maybe then we can all be truly content, and understand what matters.
My best friend happens to be my sister. Someone with whom I never got along with growing up. We've shared apartments, friends, money, and hardships. Mostly because of the fact that we are siblings. In recent years I haven't felt obligated, but have chosen to be involved. Sure, she may not like it sometimes. Like when I scare other guys away, or try to beat up her boyfriends. However, I know that in the end she is thankful for it. Her best interest is my best interest.
I was engaged early this past year. When it all ended, and I was lost. She was standing there with my compass. She was the "spinning arrow" in Pocahontas' dream. We hadn't been getting along too well, due to reasons I will not disclose. What matters is she was there when I needed someone most. Through her I realized that things would work out, and some things are destined for failure(i.e. the engagement)
My point being. We spend a lot of our time, complaining and not liking family. We go out of our ways to distance ourselves from them, and pretending they don't mean much to you. When things with friends change in a heartbeat. Friendships between men ruined because of a girl. Relationships between women ended over a man. He says she says can form sides, and create a war between friends. So many petty things can expose true colors, and we put so much time and effort into our friends. When no matter the differences, our families are always there. No matter what has gone on between us, we'll always be there. So why don't we make family the friends we choose, for once. Maybe then we can all be truly content, and understand what matters.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Success
"Suc•cess (suhk•sess)
Noun
1. The attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like."
Remember times when this was not our standard definition of success? We all need to face it, and realize that for the most part none of us will achieve any of those. At least not in the traditional sense. So who tells us if we are successful? Should we not be the ones to make that call? If we have good standing relationships with friends and family, a job that supports us, and to be trusted by the people we know an love are we not wealthy, honored, and in a high position? This used to be true. Not so much today. This definition of success constantly has us in turmoil, about how much we haven't done in our life. We are constantly pushing for more and more. We try so hard to live up to the "celebrity" lifestyle. We are only setting ourselves up for disappointment. We will never achieve what we are trained to see as great. And the reality of the matter is that we have already achieved great things. I have a best friend who I would trust with my life, and me with his.(honor) I hold a job that provides for me everything I need.(wealth) I am respected by those I know.(position) I may never be rich, famous, or powerful. But, I'm okay with that. I've worked hard in my life to attain all the wealth and honor I need, and I happen to be in a great position. I'm going to declare myself successful, and so should everyone else. With a positive outlook comes positive things. With a slight change of attitude, we may all be able to achieve the success we seek.
Noun
1. The attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like."
Remember times when this was not our standard definition of success? We all need to face it, and realize that for the most part none of us will achieve any of those. At least not in the traditional sense. So who tells us if we are successful? Should we not be the ones to make that call? If we have good standing relationships with friends and family, a job that supports us, and to be trusted by the people we know an love are we not wealthy, honored, and in a high position? This used to be true. Not so much today. This definition of success constantly has us in turmoil, about how much we haven't done in our life. We are constantly pushing for more and more. We try so hard to live up to the "celebrity" lifestyle. We are only setting ourselves up for disappointment. We will never achieve what we are trained to see as great. And the reality of the matter is that we have already achieved great things. I have a best friend who I would trust with my life, and me with his.(honor) I hold a job that provides for me everything I need.(wealth) I am respected by those I know.(position) I may never be rich, famous, or powerful. But, I'm okay with that. I've worked hard in my life to attain all the wealth and honor I need, and I happen to be in a great position. I'm going to declare myself successful, and so should everyone else. With a positive outlook comes positive things. With a slight change of attitude, we may all be able to achieve the success we seek.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Nature vs. Nurture
Do you believe that we are born with the behavioral traits of our parents, or it depends on how we're raised?
I'm divided on this one. My siblings and I were adopted at a very young age. We joined a great family. While I was raised by this family from the age of 9. I still have a tremendous cache of memories from my biological parents. I personally, can see I have the habits of both. All the negative from my birth parents. Pessimism, temper, prone to addiction, a tendency for violence, etc...while my positive traits are from my adoptive parents. Respect, chivalry, level headed, the will to do good, strong work ethic, etc...but how could this be? We believe that wild animals can't be tamed. Were dogs not once all feral? Are they now considered man's best friend? Can we take a pit bull and make it the most gentle creature you've ever seen? Yes, we can. So why can't we, as people, erase the traits of our fathers so to speak? How do we unlearn something? I believe that I was born, prone to do/act a certain way. It's in my blood. It's the way I'm wired. I also feel, were I not adopted it would be worse. I wouldn't have my "good" qualities. So which one is it? Is there a balance between the two? Maybe when I figure it out the negativity will vanish, or I may be able to accomplish things of grandeur. We may be able to block out, but speaking from experience you'll never escape it. Take the experiences in your life, and create the person you want to be. Don't let anything define you, but your own thoughts and actions. Don't let anyone tell you that you're supposed to be a certain person, and never use your past as a crutch. Nurture yourself to become the nature you choose.
I'm divided on this one. My siblings and I were adopted at a very young age. We joined a great family. While I was raised by this family from the age of 9. I still have a tremendous cache of memories from my biological parents. I personally, can see I have the habits of both. All the negative from my birth parents. Pessimism, temper, prone to addiction, a tendency for violence, etc...while my positive traits are from my adoptive parents. Respect, chivalry, level headed, the will to do good, strong work ethic, etc...but how could this be? We believe that wild animals can't be tamed. Were dogs not once all feral? Are they now considered man's best friend? Can we take a pit bull and make it the most gentle creature you've ever seen? Yes, we can. So why can't we, as people, erase the traits of our fathers so to speak? How do we unlearn something? I believe that I was born, prone to do/act a certain way. It's in my blood. It's the way I'm wired. I also feel, were I not adopted it would be worse. I wouldn't have my "good" qualities. So which one is it? Is there a balance between the two? Maybe when I figure it out the negativity will vanish, or I may be able to accomplish things of grandeur. We may be able to block out, but speaking from experience you'll never escape it. Take the experiences in your life, and create the person you want to be. Don't let anything define you, but your own thoughts and actions. Don't let anyone tell you that you're supposed to be a certain person, and never use your past as a crutch. Nurture yourself to become the nature you choose.
Justice Department
So this homeless man comes into the store. We've stopped allowing him in, because he always tries to steal. As he approaches I tell him, "Butler you know better! Leave!" "I'll commit suicide right in front of your store!!" he responds. So I tell him "go ahead I'll call the cops to come clean you up." He tries to fall down, and act like he's knocked out. I call the cops, they come, and they arrest him. As the officer is taking my report another one comes in, and informs the other that Butler has $600k+ in felony warrants. My beef...these cops all know him by name, and deal with him on a daily basis. To have that many felony warrants, he's obviously doing some very bad things. Why is someone like him not in prison? What happened to "three strikes?" The same law that I was threatened with, when I got arrested for a liquor run years ago. The same petty theft that got my best friend and I both felonies, and sent us to jail for three months. The same thing that keeps me from having fun, and doing things all out of fear of going back to jail. How is it that we make one mistake, and our lives are essentially ruined? When people like this all over the country are having fun, and living a great life. "innocent until proven guilty" yeah right! More like "guilty until you can afford the right attorney or you've done so many bad things that they don't care anymore." We live in a country where murderers and rapist are paroled on good behavior. Where pedophiles are simply required to register their address. Where drug dealers are allowed to have kids and live on welfare, because they are not legally employed. Where is the justice?
First
So, there are many reasons to start a blog. I have none, other than speak what's on my mind. I'll start by introducing myself. My name is David, and I'm a liquor store clerk. I see new and exciting things everyday. I'm here to share those experiences, and my thoughts with you. Just follow along, and I'm sure you'll enjoy.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)